When Parents Need to Move Back Home

I often joke with my kids that one day they will have to clean up my messes the way I’ve had to clean up theirs for all of these years. But suddenly this is no longer a laughing matter, as I watch my own parents’ failing health. Cancer, knee replacement surgeries, debilitating asthma. Wrap that all up, serve it with a side of diminishing income, and pass it to the most responsible of the adult children. Me.

Honestly, it’s scary to imagine. No parent ever dreams of being a burden for their children to bear. And most children can’t imagine a day when Mom and Dad are the ones needing support from them. Yet it’s inevitable.

I was just coming out of the tumultuous years of parenting and entering the more freeing stage of reclaiming a bit of my own life again when I got the call that things weren’t going well for Mom and Dad.

“We don’t know how much longer they’ll be able to make it on their own.” Obviously I’d do anything to help, no matter the cost to my own comforts. Was there a solution that would not only empower them and meet their needs, but would also allow for my family life to be uninterrupted?

I’d love to give my parents the peace of mind that comes from not living alone while still feeling a sense of independence. But that would probably take a miracle.

Anxiety over the choices I would need to make in the not-so-far-off future began to wear on me. I worried I’d have to move my family to a home with a bedroom that could accommodate my parents on the first floor, since they would soon be unable to use stairs.

I worried that my family would have to give up our privacy in order to keep a closer watch on my aging parents. I worried my mom and I would start to fight like we did when I was a teenager because—let’s be honest—some moms and daughters get along better when they are not sharing a home.

While considering my options, a friend invited me to tour Leland’s Cabins. A cabin makes me think of spending a quiet vacation surrounded by the more simple and beautiful things in life—although it also makes me think of living off the land and fighting bears.

I checked the website just in case my friend was luring me into shipping my parents off to the woods somewhere in some commune for the elderly.

Turns out the cabins are conveniently built to order and are delivered to my non-bear inhabited property, which is near multiple grocery stores. My interest was definitely piqued at the idea that I could help my parents live more safely in their own home while being advantageously just footsteps away from my back door.

I still have so many questions, but l think it’s worth the next step. Check back as I consider all of my options and share about my tour of Leland’s in hopes of finding my miracle.

Guest Post By Rebecca Gates

Rebecca is a published author and blogger whose greatest passion is connecting with her family. She spends her days wondering how her children have outgrown her already and when exactly did these lines appear on her face. With just a few years left before her boys begin to leave the nest, her goal is to make as many memories as possible before they spread their wings. She also enjoys reading, writing, traveling, restaurants, red wine and quality time with her husband and friends.